The Right Investment

Apart from Accounting 100 during my Bachelors and International Accounting during my Masters, i successfully managed to run away from all forms of accounting during my student career – i hated it that much. 6 years later, happy with my career path which i thought had no use for accounting and bam! Accounting principles for Credit Managers.

I had 2 options.

Option 1: i am not a Credit Manager and therefore i don’t need to attend the training.

Option 2: keep quiet and hustle.
I chose option 2. And now after 6 years away from University, here  I am studying for an exam on Friday.

Life always gives us options and it is up to us to pick the easy way out and stay at the same level…or pick the more challenging option, work hard and struggle through it for a short while and eventually succeed.

I believe you get out of life what you put into it; to yse the Word of God (which should be our basis for EVERYTHING), “you reap what you sow”.

How can i expect to be a Head of Commercial Business Banking or CEO if i do not build on the skills i have? Indeed, how can you reach the roof level of your house if you don’t (or wont) keep adding bricks?

How can i expect to become more intimate with God if i dont struggle through reading His Word and go from reading 1 Chapter every 3 or 4 days to 3 chapters a day? From praying a 5 minute thank you Lord prayer to a 1 hour prayer, also listening out for what God has to say to me?

The bottom line is you are your bottom line. best investment you can make is in yourself. Trust God to do the rest and open those doors. Could be those doors have been opened for a while but you were busy running away from Accounting and were not ready to walk through them.

Tangled Jewel

My mother loves buying me jewellery.  She loves jewellery and of course as her only daughter, it’s only normal that she expects me to love jewellery. I don’t love it but i don’t hate it either. I just like a simple, hassle-free life. On an ordinary day the most jewellery i have on is my wedding band  (but of course), a pair of earings (mind you sometimes it’s the same pair throughout the week) and a simple braclet that I’ve had for years with zirconia stones running around it (some of which have fallen off). So no, jewellery is really not my number one priority.

My mum loves buying me jewellery. She bought me 2 pairs of earings for my wedding (i only wore one), 2 bracelets (i only wore one) and two neckalces (i think i wore both (at seperate times of course) so at least i made an effort). I think my mum couldn’t decide which earings/bracelet/necklace to get me because each piece was beautiful. Or maybe it was because she knows how fussy i am so she needed to provide me with options- i dont know. All i know is that i love my mum and i want her to keep buying me jewellery.

Okay so now that i have established my indifference to jewellery i can continue…

On Tuesday i decided to wear a necklace to work. I dont know why but i did. I was going to wear a ‘salmon pink’ cardigan and I remembered i had a matching necklace. Now, as a person who is indifferent to jewellery you can imagine that i do not store my jewellery well so when i found the necklace i wanted to wear, it was tangled up with a bunch of other necklaces.

For some mysterious reason, i must have been very determined to wear this necklace because my normal reaction to the tangled mess would have been “Ah, forget this!”. However, despite the fact that i was running late for work i decided to sit on the bed and detangle the mess of about six or so necklaces just so that i could get wear that particular necklace. (maybe i was missing my mum).

If you have ever tried detangling a bunch of tangled necklaces you will know that it is not something you can rush through (lest you get them even more tangled). You have to work slowly and carefully, ensuring that you do not destroy the necklaces. You have to be patient.

So as i sat there slowly and carefully seperating my necklaces, it occured to me that this is exactly what God does with our lives. Each of us has a specific God-given purpose to fulfil, which He has placed inside of us. We are to discover what this purpose is but most times in our journey of life, as we are trying to discover what this purpose is we get tangled up. We get tangled up with looking for love in all the wrong places – with all the wrong people, getting hurt along the way, when all along the One who loved us first has always been there. We get tangled up living a life of lies, piling up debt and tossing away our self-esteem, trying to be people we are not because of the ‘perfect lives’ we see on the media (traditional and social media).

When we reach that place of being a tangled mess and the mess finally breaks us down to the realisation that all we really needed was God (duh!), what does He do? He gently picks us up and slowly and oh-so carefully begins to detangle us from the mess. He untangles us from self-loathing and frees us from low self-esteem. He untangles us from our fake lives and the people that are not meant to grow with us by showing us what we truly need to live a fulfilled life.  He untangles us from unrighteousness and sickness and pain and fills us wth love, joy and peace. He does not stop working on us and in us.

Its not an easy job and it’s not a job that can be rushed. Sometimes even during this process it looks like the tangled mess is worse than when He first began but worry not – He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it. Nothing is impossible for God- there is no mess He cannot fix.

A tangled jewel is still a jewel after all.




Getting Married in Zambia| Step 4| Who Gives This Woman Away?

So…where were we?

Oh. Yes, you are rushing to the church because your groom is waiting and the driver seems to be taking his own sweet time (even though you are literally a 6 minute drive away). Its just you, dad and the driver. There is no music playing and not much conversation (you and your dad don’t exactly know what to say to each other). You can see the church when you remember that you forgot the Salt for the Salt ceremony! To go back or not to go back? If you go back, your groom might think that you are a Runaway Bride so you stay. Besides, if you forgot the salt, he definitely did (he did).



It hasn’t really sunk in that the day that you have cried and prayed and fasted over is finally here. Not that you doubted God’s Word; the vision He showed you of yourself in a Wedding Dress in front of the ‘2014 Year of Going Beyond Limits’ at the 2013/2014 Cross-Over Service. You knew He would do it, you just didn’t know how hard getting to this point would be (bringing two families is not easy, add to that the fact that the devil hates anything that’s good).

You only know that it’s really happening when you hear Nathan Nyirenda playing the intro to The One He Kept For Me by Maurette Brown Clark on his Saxophone.  When you hear the the singer capturing the emotion of this song that perfectly captures what this day is about, you can’t  help but break down.

You are reminded that “God is not human that he should lie, not a human being, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?”- Numbers 23: 19






Pastor: Who gives this woman away?

The moment of truth has arrived. Your father (or Uncle or male guardian) in a bold, strong voice announces “I, ………… the Father of the Bride, i give her away” (insert respective name of Father/Uncle/Male Guardian here). Your groom walks over, greets the parent that is giving you away, takes your hand and walks you to the altar.

Now most people do not know that significance of this “giving away” which has become a formality of so many marriage ceremonies. Genesis 2: 24 says “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become on flesh”. The man, your groom has left his parents home to become united with you, the bride. As a bride, you do not leave of your own accord, you have to be given away by the head of the house (your father/uncle/guardian) to the new head, your husband. The significance of this moment should not pass you by- be given away with the grace and humility it deserves.

This is your first act of submission.


Getting Married in Zambia | Step 4 | Get Me to the Church on Time!

It is is now 10 days to our 1st anniversary and i really, honestly can’t believe it has been a year already?!!. People say the first year (or couple of years) are the hardest because all the pretense  of dating and the excitement of planning a wedding have passed; its now just the two of you and there is no more pretending that you roll the toothpaste from the bottom when in fact you don’t.

Our first year was not easy, we laughed, we cried, we argued, we made up – nothing out of the ordinary (i think). It wasn’t easy, but it was worth it ( sorry, i couldn’t  resist that cliché).

As we celebrate our 1st year together, I’d  like to talk a walk down memory lane and wrap up my series on Getting Married in Zambia.


The morning of the wedding day for the Bride and Groom in Zambia is filled with last minute to-do’s and phone calls (unless your bridesmaids confiscate your phone)- mostly because it is not yet common to hire a Wedding Planner or the Bride,  if they are anything like me think that only we can get things done PER-FEC-TLY

You are the first one to wake up,  and you make sure you have your bath first before waking up the entire household. Of course you are coming down with the flu after spending the night before decorating the church with your fiance (you are an event planner and decorator after all). So lemon and honey tea, Strepsils and a dry piece of bread is sufficient for your breakfast.

You are just in time for your hair appointment but the stylist cant seem to get it just like the one in the picture you got off Pinterest…you are happy with the end result because you know you were just being fussy but of course you are late for your make-up appointment  (and now you look back and wonder why you didnt ask the stylist to come home like you did the make-up artist *duh*). But its okay, your make-up turned out perfect. So did your mum’s,  even though she thinks it’s  too much; but that’s mum for you.




The "it's too much make-up" face


Its time to get your dress on- wait! Where are the bridesmaids?? (i think I should write romance comedy at the rate I’m going with this post- but i promise, it was that dramatic). The brisldesmaids are late (no electricity at the salon perhaps?) but they are finally here to help the bride get ready- oh and they look fabulous thanks to the brides being dictatorial on their entire look.


Through out the ‘organised chaos’, dad is calm, reading the newspapers, having already done the seating arrangementsfor the reception.


Lawyer's scribble

The moment of truth……does the dress fit???? Yes! It does. It’s perfect (please note that this is not always the case for Zambian brides) but its got tooo many darn buttons!!


At this point, you say forget these 101 buttons, I’m  late! And off you go, to you handsome groom with half your buttons undone.


Service should have started at 10.00am


Vendor Information
Hair: Yami’s Collection Arcades Mall
Make-up: Embeauti Hair and Makeup Studio
Wedding Dress: Custom-made, LaceMarry Etsy Shop (Yes, i bought my dress online! I couldn’t  find any plus-size wedding dresses that suited my shape in Lusaka)
Bride’s  Shoes: Ebay
Hair Band: Brass Lotus Etsy Shop
Mother-of-the-Bride’s Dress: Online
Mother-of-the-Bride’s Shoes: Ebay

Before 30

Today i say goodbye to my 20’s and hello to my 30’s.

To be honest with you, i haven’t really been excited about my Birthday this year, which, trust me is really shocking for me. I am a big advocate for celebrating birthdays and making sure that a birthday is made special. My parents spoiled me with cake and presents each year, sometimes even a party just to make me feel special on the day. When i was in boarding school, my parents would either come visit me or send me some goodies on my birthday…so yes, i have been blessed (read spoilt) and birthdays are a big deal for me.

I haven’t  been excited about the big 3-0 and here is why….

I had so many plans/hopes/dreams that i  wanted to have achieved by this day. I thought by 30 i would have my first child. I also thought i would have my own house (with a big garden) in my name, instead of still paying rent. That my event business would be successful, with me owning my own exclusive venue. Finally, that i would have made strides in my career and probably at Executive level.

But the day is here and i haven’t achieved any of the things that i wanted to. But you know what? It’s okay.

It’s okay because even though i am not where i want to be, i am in a great place. And you know what, i have achieved a lot and i am truly blessed ( and I’m not just saying that).
I have a family and a husband that love me (the twins are still coming). I have a good job and a good income (and i will still be an Executive one day). I am very hopeful about my business and i am excited about the God given ideas for its expansion. Most importantly for me, i now know who God has called me to be; the calling He has placed over my life. I welcome the challenges and i am excited for the start of my ministry.

Yep, i did good.  But i couldn’t have done it without God looking out for me. I just want to take this moment and publicly declare my love for God. I am sooooo grateful for what He has done in bringing me this far, that i am alive today and i am thankful  for His PERFECT plan over my life- His time is best.  So i dedicate this day to praising Him and i dedicate this song by Pastor Donnie McClurkin to my Maker.

“Great is Your Mercy toward me
Your Love and Kindness toward me
Your tender Mercies i see
Day after day

Forever Faithful towards me
Always providing for me
Great is Your Mercy towards me
Great is Your Grace”


Life is good @30

Interviews and Auditions

I started writing this moooonths ago but never got round to finishing it..but here goes…

I have spent the last couple of weeks of my life in a jittery state. I dont know about you but whenever i have something big happening, i get so nervous and my life becomes a series of sleepless nights and a running tummy (as if I’m on some kind of detox)- my final year exams were definitely  a time i would rather forget.

The last 2 weeks i have been preparing for job interviews and auditions.  There is nothing worse than putting yourself out there (in a vulnerable) position to be judged by people who know nothing about you – and it’s entirely up to you to impress them in 10 minutes or less. You can go through as many interview questions as possible, or rehearse the song you’re going to sing a thousand times,  but the outcome isn’t really up to you. You performance will be judged by those who have granted you this opportunity.


My life back when i first started writing this felt like it was in limbo. The music ministry at my church was being refreshed and I needed a new job (and more money, that always helps). Simply put, i needed to be in a place where i would be given the opportunity to grow, to flourish, to be able to spread my wings. I was so unhappy in my previous job that waking up was a struggle. I had attended a couple of promising job interviews before, i had been told the job was mine but somehow i always found myself walking through the same doors.

I reached a point where i think i gave up and accepted my fate in a place that was making me unhappy. Till i got a call and i found myself preparing for an Interview and an Audition in the same week.

Was i ready for the biggest performances of my life?
Truth be told, i wasn’t. There’s only so much i could have done to prepare- this was one if the first times i totally relied on God- you know, when you say “let Your will be done in my life Lord”, only this time you really mean it.


4 months down the line, i am in a new job with a new company that is encouraging me to grow, to flourish and to spread my wings and my ministry is back on track and i have been asked to be a part of its leadership (me, the girl that thought she couldn’t even sing).

It wasn’t an accident that i had an interview and an audition in the same week- God was up to something and He isn’t finished with me yet. Just like He isn’t finished with You. He has not forgotten about you- He knows what you are going through and He is up to something.


Why I Sing

I have never been good at expressing myself. Perhaps it’s because i grew up being the only girl in a house full of boys. ..well having two older brothers was like having six.  I thought i had to be as loud as them in order to be noticed, not that I knew it then of course.

I preferred to  be lost in the magical world that an author’s imagination could take me to. But i never got to express myself. I know that sounds sad but i had a happy childhood. I was a loud, talkative little girl that just hadn’t found  her voice yet, pretending to be someone that maybe she really wasn’t (that sounds really deep for a little  girl).

I discovered that i loved to sing. I loved the way it made me feel.  I loved that i was finally able to express what was on my heart. I loved that i didn’t have to pretend to be someone else, that when i sang my family could finally see me. Singing showed me that there was something deep inside of me that needed to get out.

I am a young Christian woman and i still sing today. I still sing today because it remains an honest and pure way to express myself, for my own sake as well as to express what God has placed inside of me. The thing with singing (and i am talking about worshipping God) from the heart is that you can’t hide from the truth. You can try and hide from it for a while ,  or you can try and fight it but thats a losing battle.

When God places ‘ a song’ inside of you, ,it’s for a purpose. It’s not for that song to just sit idle inside of you. Its to save a generation, to draw the lost, to heal the broken.

I have been hiding, i have been fighting, i have been holding back. But i am ready. Its time to let my song out.

I’m ready.

I Just Called to Say….


Lord, i know that lately my mind hasn’t been on You,
But on the little and so-called big worries of everyday life.
‘Do not be anxious about anything’, Your Word to me isnt new,
As i learn everday the Power of a Praying Wife.

So today i just want to Praise you, just for who you are,
You who first loved me, Before i was formed, You knew Me.
For what You have done Lord, for all Your splendour,
I praise You today, King of Kings, Majesty.

You deserve all Glory, You have been so good to me,
Several times i have knocked and many open doors I have seen.
You are worthy of all praise, there is nowhere else i would rather be,
I lift up my hands and my voice, looking back at where i have been.

Everlasting King, whose eye is ever on the sparrow,
Im thankful for Your ear thats always ready to hear my every cry.
I will always choose life, no matter the path thats narrow,
You are more than worthy, because just for me, you sent Your Son to die.

I know these words, compared to Your love Lord is not much,
But my heart will sing your praises all my days on this earth.
You who ensures that Your annointed, none can touch,
Your praise shall continually be in my mouth, though more is what you are worth.

I Love you Lord, more than anything i could ever give,
With everything that is within me, i present the praise You are due.
My words may make no sense, but for You Lord  i will always  live,
I just called to say…LORD I LOVE YOU.

How to Get Married in Zambia (A Country in a Continent called Africa)

If you thought getting married was as easy as (1) your guy getting down on one knee, (2) proposing to you with a decent sized bling ring and (3) planning the wedding of your dreams, then you are probably not Zambian.

A very good friend sent me a song that as i listened to, brought back a rush of emotions as i thought back on the year that was. A year of tears, a few smiles, regular fasting, a lot of prayer…and more tears. Oh, not forgetting the occasional running stomach and scraped knees (i kid you not).

Title of the song: Storm is Over by D’atra Hicks and T.D Jakes Potter House Praise Team.
I know what you’re thinking…Storm is Over??? Really?

Now don’t get me wrong, getting married is a beautiful thing. It is however not a journey for the faint hearted- especially if you are;

1) Christian – the Devil hates it when a Christian couple decides to get married. Must be something to do with obtaining favour from the Lord and the fact that God ordained marriage as something good and when God says something is good, then it’s goood. You know the Devil and his pesky habit of stealing, killing and destroying.

This is where the Prayer and Fasting comes in. And some of the tears.

2) Zambian – there’s nothing wrong with being Zambian, i love that I’m Zambian, God made me Zambian for a reason (He is still revealing that to me). Zambian weddings are not a 1 day affair. In fact, the getting married process can start months in advance. For me, it started in January of 2014. My actual wedding date, as in ‘I-Do date‘ was the 22nd of November, 2014. Yep.

And this is where the tears come in – and the rest of it -scraped knees and all.

So, being the nice person that i am, i have decided to write a How-to guide on getting married in Zambia (HTGMZ).

Stay tuned.

Mrs D.

Due to the sacredness of marriage and aspects of tradition, the guide will in fact just be a few tidbits of my journey to the altar; challenges faced and things that helped me get through.
No actual secrets will be revealed. If you really want to know, get married. In Zambia.

Heal Our Nation

“My nation Zambia is Prosperous and at Peace”. This has been part of our invocation as Mount Zion Christian Centre for 2014. These might have semmed like just mere words at the beginning of this year but this declaration was for a time such as this.

From Independence eve (23rd October 2014) a song has been on my heart. I did not understand why my spirit would lay the words of this song upon my heart, especially at a time of celebration, a time of jubilee. It makes sense now. Please share this prayer:

” LORD, WE LONG FOR YOU to move in power;
There’s a hunger deep within our hearts,
To see healing in our nation.
Send Your Spirit to revive us:

Heal our nation,
Heal our nation,
Heal our nation,
Pour out Your Spirit on this land.

Lord we hear Your Spirit, coming closer,
A mighty wave to break upon our land,
Bringing justice, and forgiveness.
God we cry to You, ‘Revive us'”




Peace Be Still.