So, word has gotten around that I have been on a diet because I want to lose weight for the wedding…which is not the case as you should all know from reading my posts…right? (It can’t just be my mum who follows me :-/)
Although….it wouldnt hurt to look extra hot (in a respectable way of course) as I say goodbye to singlehood and make a right turn onto marriage bliss highway.
After months of eating clean (in between several cheat
meals days weeks months) , aerobics, boot camp and personal trainers, I have discovered the ‘getting married diet’, hereafter referred to as ‘The GMD’.
Now this diet isn’t for every Jim and Jane. In order to be on the GMD, one has to be about to tie the knot; get married, commit to one man (or woman, though the experts do not state whether this diet works for men getting married too) for the rest of one’s life.
The theory behind this special diet according to the experts (Zambian Aunties and elderly women from church) is simple; The stress from all the planning, running up, down and sideways, plus the family drama (as two very large families try to make sense of the other’s way of doing things) will ensure that you will not have time to feed yourself, let alone even think about feeding yourself- the weight will just melt off of you! Brilliant!
Someone tell that to my body.
Darn it, im out of chocolate, please hold my chips.